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How to deal with negative thoughts and anxiety?

How to deal with negative thoughts and anxiety?

After much deliberation, I decided to talk about anxiety, malaise, negative thoughts that haunt us, and how we can influence all this ourselves. 

A lot of my clients face similar challenges and maybe now it’s really the right time to talk about it as much as possible and help as many people as possible. It is very important that in such situations one is aware that they are not alone and that this is just the current situation.

We all carry emotional scars from our youth due to traumatic or merely difficult experiences. Early in our life, we experienced events that shaped us. The emotions associated with them helped layer by layer to create our personality.

Let’s face it, we’ve all been marked by events imbued with extremely strong emotions.

And whenever we think about these experiences, the body always relives them, even if only with thoughts. But every thought is also associated with a feeling.

When we are young, we always have our hands full, which allows us to temporarily avoid old, strong emotions. We literally sweep them under the rug. We are inspired by new friends, trips to unknown places, hard work and effort to progress, acquiring new skills or engaging in new sports. We rarely suspect that many of these actions are driven by feelings associated with certain events in our past.

By the mid-thirties or forties, when the personality is fully formed, we already experience most of what life has to offer.

Therefore, we can largely expect the outcome of most events or experiences that surround us.

Even before we face most things, we already know how we will feel about it.

We well know the nuances of bad and good relationships. Because we can predict probable emotions before the actual experience happens, we decide whether we want to experience a particular “known” event before it actually happens.

Of course, all this is happening in our subconscious.

Why and when do things get complicated?

Because we can predict the feelings that will accompany most events, we already know if we want to experience an already known situation before it happens.

When we reach middle age, however, nothing can banish the feeling of emptiness.


You wake up every morning and feel like the same person.

The environment that has filled most of our time so far no longer does its job.

And how could it, as the influence of emotions that has been caused in us by the external environment is fading within us, because we already know that we are the exactly same person who went to bed last night and woke up to a new day today.

This is known by most people as a midlife crisis.

Most people try really hard to hide these feelings and therefore delve into material things, buy a new sports car, some rent a sailboat, go on a long trip, others make new friends, shop, renovate their home, join a new club or even undergo plastic surgery.

All of the above are futile attempts at feeling better or at least feeling differently. The point is that when enthusiasm for new things, places, or relationships subsides, we find ourselves on the same level of emotional identity again.

When we try to escape this emptiness, we run away from emotions because dealing with them is too uncomfortable or even painful.

When we start to lose control, we simply turn on the television, browse the web, call someone or send them a message, start talking, and instantly change our emotions.

What was outside of us put us in a better mood, so we start relying on that and always come back to it when we feel emptiness within us.

But basically what happens with persisting in these disorders is that we become more and more dependent on something outside of us that is changing our inside.

We need increasingly stronger stimuli to achieve the same feeling in order to feel different or better, and doing so can turn into a constant search for pleasure and ways to avoid pain at all costs.

We crave a life of enjoyment, and this desire is driven by a feeling that we can never get rid of, but is always present in our subconscious.

Some people, however, don’t try to hide these feelings and lie to themselves, but begin to wonder who they are, what their mission in life is, for whom they do all this, what happiness is, whether there is anything more in life, what is important at all, what is love, where do I find it… and the soul begins to awaken.

We realise that external stimuli are not important and that nothing in the environment will improve our well-being and that maintaining the ideal for the sake of others is in fact a strategy by which we run away from feelings that never catch up with us.

Now what?

No more compulsive shopping, no more surfing the web, no more endless searching for company and attention.

Suddenly we feel restless, our breathing becomes shallower and shallower, we have a million negative thoughts that create chaos in our mind.

Our heart starts to beat unevenly, maybe our blood pressure is rising, we feel like we are going to explode, we can barely breathe and we have a feeling that we are going to suffocate, there is no air in the room, we are getting hot and we are more and more restless and helpless. 

Yeah, that’s it, that’s the feeling I’ve experienced countless times myself.

Countless times I thought I was going to die, that I was going to suffocate, that I was gasping for air.

I thought maybe my heart was failing or that I was losing my mind 

I often remember these feelings, especially when people ask me how can you always smile, be so positive and in high spirits… you look so strong and determined, nothing ever rattles you.

When I hear this, I just smile and say to myself this is me, the real me without a mask. If you take it off, you will look the same.

But it’s not that simple. We can’t just remove the mask and show our true face. It takes work, a lot of energy, willpower, focus and of course practice, practice, practice.

The first thing I advise you to do is to learn to breathe. Open a browser and Google a little, and you will find countless breathing exercises, ways and techniques that will help you to overcome a crisis or to calm down easily and start thinking rationally.

Millions of people worldwide have problems like yours, and everyone deals with them in their own unique way. What is important is that you start working on yourself and that you start dealing with emotions and situations. Day after day, you persevere and do not go to the established patterns of seeking attention and comfort in the external environment.

One of the simple exercises that has helped me a lot in difficult times and still helps me is the box breathing technique.

We inhale slowly and count to six, then hold the air and count to six, then exhale with all our strength, completely emptying our lungs, visualising how all the emotions we no longer need are leaving our body and how our thoughts and body are cleansed.

Repeat the exercise at least six times and you will feel your breathing is calming down and deepening, your thoughts are becoming clearer, chaos in your mind is disappearing, and your heartbeat and blood pressure are becoming more even.

This is also one of the basic energy exercises I use in energy coaching. The feedback I get is mostly extremely positive. The improvements that clients experience are greater than expected.

By repeating the exercise several times, they feel immediate relief in the body, the muscles slowly relax, which leads to general well-being.

After performing the exercise, you are calm and can slowly think of solutions and let your body find its rhythm. 

Our body is created to fight or flee.

The fact is there is no point in tilting at windmills. Even stronger is the realisation that we don’t have to run away from ourselves, no matter how much outside influence we give in to. Each of us sooner or later faces their shadow self.

Snow-covered Bridge – Paulo Coelho

Snow-covered Bridge – Paulo Coelho

… personal growth according to Paul Coelho. Ignoring the facts and circumstances around you does not change the state of things.

How many times have you pretended that the world around you did not exist, or were heartless about the facts? Be aware that the only thing that changes facts is action; ignoring changes nothing, so stop procrastinating and live your personal legend.

It is essential for growth to surround yourself with people who are smarter than you. Jim Rohn said: “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”

It may seem banal and even a bit uncomfortable, but the quality of people you meet is essential for growth, because more intelligent people can encourage you.
You can also positively encourage people you spend time with.

Life can be difficult; the secret is that this is up to us.
Life is hard for everyone, some have to fight more, others less. Whatever the case, we have to stop complaining, roll up our sleeves and regain control of our decisions: quality decisions lead to quality consequences.

Smile is a way of opening a communication channel. A lot of people you meet on the street deserve your smile.

How many times have you felt a little better because of a simple smile of a stranger? In exchange for receiving a smile, give a smile; the world will open up and someone else will give you happiness.

We find happiness during the climb, not just at the top.

The top is definitely important, but equally important is the journey, which can often take a long time.

Because climbing consists of many small peaks, it is like enjoying a small part at a time, so it pays to enjoy life and fight for one’s goals.

Sometimes you cannot choose how you feel. You can decide what to do with your feelings, you can stay down or use the situation to your advantage as a future source of valuable experiences.

Never stop learning. Keep learning about the topics that awaken passion in you because you cannot really know how that piece of knowledge will help you make the leap in the quality of your life.

Opportunities are all around you. We are flooded with opportunities every day, but unfortunately most of the time we are not aware of it.

Source: www.crescitaindividuale.com

Tips for a successful business, after the epidemic

Tips for a Successful Business after the epidemic comes to an end

We are all aware that the virus has had a profound impact on the economy and that some businesses have suffered more damage than others. Of course, it depends on your activity, but some of you were able to move your business to the internet and still work, others were able to carry on physically, but to a lesser extent, and some were unfortunately forced to close everything.

Nevertheless, we have to be aware that by being grateful we will achieve much more and that we will have to roll up our sleeves – well, we all can already hardly wait.

With this article, we want to encourage and motivate everyone to, after all of this is over, start with new, even better energy, to try not to look back and to simply be the best you can be. Therefore, we offer solutions for how to successfully focus on business.

Organisation and prioritisation

Yes, it sounds familiar, and you think you have everything under control, but once you return to your daily routine you could easily get lost in daily tasks and lose sight of what really matters. When you are overworked, stop, write down the job-related tasks you need to do, leave it for 20 minutes and change your environment (go into nature, have lunch, do some stretching exercises).

When you come back, your head will be relaxed, so make a list of priorities again, the highest priority being that which benefits your company the most – as this decision brings you GROWTH.

When you are overworked, stop, write down the job-related tasks you need to do, leave it for 20 minutes and change your environment (go into nature, have lunch, do some stretching exercises).

Connect with your WHY?!

Think about why you started your business, write it on several pieces of paper and stick some in different places as a reminder. Imagine your goal, change or the life you want to create – this will help you move from the point of being overwhelmed to the new energy, with which you will achieve your vision.

We all know that discipline and consistency are required for success, but if you consider them as a daily obligation, there is a good chance of burnout, so connect with your WHY I BEGAN?

SECRET, secret ingredient

What does that mean? It is a secret ingredient taught by successful business and spiritual teachers; this ingredient is FOCUS. You need to focus on how you experience the world, how you think, what you do. We all agree that entrepreneurship can be stressful and unpredictable, but it is also true that many times it is wonderful, because it gives you the opportunity to make money while building something you believe in and love. Slow down your thinking so that your choices are clear; you can choose to build your dream or to take on the responsibilities of running a business.

I hope this article helps you restart your work and that you are able to see this as a new opportunity, knowing that nothing is lost.

We will be happy if you share this article with your friends, maybe it will inspire others as well.

Slow down your thinking to make your choices clear, you may choose to build your dreams or make business commitments.

How does the path of personal growth begin?

How does the path of your Personal Growth really begin?

Are you excited to be able to delve into yourself and your personal development journey? Or are you a little insecure, reluctant and wondering what this is all about and where to start?

Let me briefly explain how you begin your personal development journey. The matter is very simple, and believe me, you are not even aware at first that this is it and that it is so easy.

The first and most important thing is to understand the following: Starting your personal development journey does not mean you are full of shortcomings and need some sort of “fixing” or “upgrading”!

By no means, you do not even have to think about it. In fact, the opposite is true.

What is personal development?

You may not be aware of this, but today you are not the same person as you were yesterday.

The moment you have decided to learn about personal development and start reading about it so you can start your journey, you have already moved a centimetre forward and you are on your way. There is no way back. You will never be the same as you have been before.

That’s what I’m talking about, it’s about personal development, and yes, it’s that simple.

Suddenly, you are thinking a lot about areas that can be improved, so you can move from your current position to the point where you want to be in your life.

The moment you have decided to learn about personal development and start reading about it so you can start your journey, you have already moved a centimetre forward and you are on your way.

Next, put together a realistic plan of action and put in consistent work to get there, while gradually getting used to the mindset. You will unleash your full potential over time.

Are you aware, that you have already taken your first step here?! Now let’s design our personal development plan.

Personal development areas

Your dreams and aspirations are likely to include some of the following areas of life:

Think about each area: is there a specific aspect of your life that you want to focus on? Write down everything you want. It is important that you write it down; you can use a computer, but if you ask me, it’s even better to write by hand in a notebook. I’m quite traditional about this, even though I love technology.

The point is to write down everything, down to a detailed description of the car you want to drive, the house you would like to live in, or the partner you want to meet.

Take a moment to reflect and explore your true desires. Maybe your health is upsetting you and now seems like the right time for drastic action.

Maybe it is time to think about saving.

If you want to dig deeper into yourself, focus on each area individually and process it in depth, connect deeply with your inner self. This magical exercise for self-discovery and self-awareness is a key part of personal development.

Why do you need a personal development plan?

I firmly believe that if you can think of something and come up with a detailed plan of what you are going to do, you can make it happen.

Your personal development plan is your plan. It is a kind of a compass that ensures you are on the right track to your goals.

Not only that, it will often remind you why you set your goals and why you can achieve them. After all, you thought of them yourself! Divide your grand plan into small pieces.

You have written down your dreams and wishes. Now, next to them, make a list of the little things you need to do to accomplish them. Divide your grand plan into small pieces to make it easier to handle.

You should devote all your attention on the plan every day, one day after the other, every single day. Not only once in a while or once a week.
No, you have to do it every day to reach your goal.

For example, if you plan to increase your knowledge by reading books about personal development and self-help, read at least 30 minutes every day, not just once a week. Get used to doing one thing related to your personal development plan every day, and you will surely reach your goal.

Why are plans important to you?

Do you want to become a millionaire, a successful writer, or an inspirational life coach? Consider the reasons why achieving goals is so important to you.

Maybe you want to prove to yourself that you can do it. Or you want to give your family all the comfort that money can buy. Maybe you like the idea of becoming a best-selling author.

Regardless of the reasons, you need to be sure that you have a strong enough reason that is meaningful to you and that you will not give up.

This is the driving force that will encourage you. Your strong reason will drive you to action and become extremely important in the pursuit of goals.

Do you want to become a millionaire, a successful writer, or an inspirational life coach? Consider the reasons why achieving goals is so important to you.

What do you want to give up?

There is a book to read, YouTube to watch, a podcast to listen to, courses you take, notes and diaries to write.

To do all of these things, you will have to sacrifice certain others, such as drinking, socialising or watching television. You will also need to step out of your comfort zone and prepare for unfamiliar territory, people and situations.

Think about what you will give up and I will tell you how strong your determination is.

Is it worth it?

If you were certain that there was nothing standing between you and your dream life, you would not hesitate and give your best to make your dream come true.

Which means that you are the only person preventing you from living your ideal life.

We all have the opportunity to learn, grow, expand our boundaries, become the best version of ourselves and live our dream life.

If you ask me if personal development is worth it, I can only say that I wish I started it sooner.

It is impossible to think differently, when you see all areas of life, including physical and mental health, improve. The result is visible quickly and the surroundings notice it quickly.

Important: the plan should be clearly defined

I cannot emphasise this enough: make a very precise plan. “I’ll run for one hour at 19:00, Wednesday and Friday.” is better than “I’ll run 3 times a week.”

“3 times a week” delays getting into the right mindset.

When you do not set your goal clearly enough, it is very easy to set it aside: you convince yourself that you still have a few days to “accomplish it”. I will tell you about my first-hand experience.

When I made the plan to write 30 articles a month, I thought I will write 5–6 articles when I have a good day and have them in stock, and then I can do something else for a few days.

This kind of mental planning doesn’t work. It doesn’t surprise me at all that I didn’t succeed. On the other hand, when I decided to post daily during my 30-day challenge, it went great.

There wasn’t any “should I post on the blog today or tomorrow?” The goal was specific. It was a daily thing, without exception.

Once you make a detailed and very specific plan, you eliminate the tiredness of decision-making, constant deliberation and delaying, by simply proceeding with it without excuse or discussion.

Every time you accept a new challenge as part of your personal development, the challenge can take 30 days or 100 days, even 7 days; that doesn’t really matter.

Make sure you monitor your progress. Review what is working and what is not. Find out what needs to be done. This is how you continue to develop and improve.

When you do not set your goal clearly enough, it is very easy to set it aside: you convince yourself that you still have a few days to “accomplish it”.

Final thoughts

I cannot tell you enough how much my personal journey has changed me for the better. The path of personal development is a lifelong process. We look at all areas of our lives and create an explicit intention to live the best life.

With every effort you will become the best version of yourself and take a step closer to living your dreams. It is worth it; it is worth every step, effort, pain, tear, laughter, because you look back and see who you have really become and where you were before. I am grateful for every minute and hour that I have dedicated to myself to become what I am now.

With love.

Adapted from: moneyhabitmuse.com

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